In days gone by, there was a phrase "honor among thieves". The concept being that even those who stole from people, had a code of honor among themselves. There was a code for those in the mafia that they never "whacked" someone in front of their family. There was even a code in prison that those that had hurt children, were tortured the worst. In this day and age, we see very little honor. CEO's stealing from retirement funds. Public figures admitting publicly to infidelity. Sports figures taking steroids. Children teasing each other to the point of suicide. You can't even get everyone to take turns when they merge in traffic. This has become the day of "as long as I get mine...". Now I totally get that most everyone wants to "win" or "be the best". But how you get there should matter, too. Did you win following the rules? Or did you cheat, or at least bend, the rules? Is that truly a victory? Are you winning at the expense of others? Good leaders excel by bringing up everyone around them - not by climbing over them. Is your leadership code honorable?
One of my leadership activities is being a business coach. I help others identify their goals and plan strategies to achieve their goals. Very often, the initial coaching goes something like this- "What are your goals?" "These are my goals." "What do you need to do to achieve these goals?" "I need to do a,b,c." "When do you want to have these goals achieved?" "By this date." And then off they go. OK- so there is more, but this boils it down to the essentials. Next coaching (after they have actually done some of the steps) sometimes goes like this- "No one will a or b." "What was their objection?" "I asked them to a or b for me, and they just said no." "What did you offer them?" "I offered them a or b and they said no." "What was in it for them?" "I didn't even get to tell them because they said no." "So why would they want a or b?&quo
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